If my son comes home with a girl or a boy,
and tells me they are in love, I will give them 
my blessing and assist them all I can.

People fall in love with a soul, and those are everywhere.

But when my daughter gets beat by 4 laps
in a swim meet by a person who 2 years ago
was ejaculating to old Playboy centerfolds,
I lose my fucking mind.

Love,
Chagall